Are You Ruining Your Relationships?

over 9 years ago
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Sophea (rravenmoon)

410 posts

Are you ruining your relationships?

When a relationship is new we may want to be with this person all the time, but is this a good idea? If you make yourself too available to your new guy things may not go as you had hoped.

What does a guy really want?

Guys want a girl with a life. A life that is busy and full of activity. Obviously you both had friends, family and other obligations and commitments before you met. Don’t cancel your plans with friends and family and make your whole world about them.

Any guy you are dating should be fine with you being busy. It is just about the perfect balance between too busy and too available.

Consequences of Being Too Available

1. Your guy loses interest in you. Men like a challenge and if you are too available then you become boring.

2. You will lose his respect for you. If he thinks you have no life outside of him he will see you as needy.

3. If the relationship does not work out you are going to be a very lonely person.

Playing hard to get is taking it too far. But give your guy time to miss you. If you have plans then reschedule with him. Just do not let him assume he can see you anytime.

over 9 years ago

Thanks for posting this!

over 9 years ago
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Cespo (cespo36)

2 posts

This is the problem. There are too many games in relationships. I disagree with you. Many guys do not like challenges but something to happen naturally or not forced. Of course no one likes anyone to be clingy or desperate for marriage. If I am dating a girl, I wouldn’t like it if she is always busy or never has time for me. This gives me mixed messages of what she really wants from me and I begin to lose interest. This happened to me in the beginning of my last relationship. In the beginning, she was always busy, never had time for anything. One night dinner with friends, another night running, another night playing squash etc… always talking about her career and studies. So I did not bother to communicate with her because I thought she was not interested or wanted a relationship. So I pulled back. 5 months later she wants a commitment, wants to know what I want with her and she feels I do not care. I think the most important thing is communication. If you begin to date someone, put all games aside and just communicate and find out what you want with each other, how often you should see each other etc… Too many games out there.

over 9 years ago

Forcing a relationship does not work. If you really strive to know one another in a genuine manner, a mutual respect is obtained that can stand the test of time. Don’t allow someone to play mind games with you Christopher.

over 9 years ago
cespo36 didn't upload a photo

Cespo (cespo36)

2 posts

I agree with you Sylvia. It is all about communication. But too many people these days play so many games and are not honest about their real intentions. I donĀ“t think they were minds games. This person was just following the usual dating games. When I did not give her what she wanted (because she gave me the impression she was not looking for anything serious)then she opened up. Of course I was baffled.